Remembrances

It is difficult for me to remember you, mom.  Not because I can't, but because it hurts so much to do so.  It reminds me of the incredible loss of not having you in this world with me anymore.  I had so many dreams and plans for us but God had a better plan-He wanted you with Him and you are much better off.  I am glad.  But it is already fading-your passing, your funeral.  I do not want you to fade-ever.  So here goes with just a few of my memories of you, not what other people have told me or what I have seen in pictures, but what I remember:

You and I playing tennis, laughing so hard we could not breathe-making fun of ourselves because we looked like we were catching butterflies.

You getting your black glove caught on my braces in church and then us busting out laughing when the organist dropped the hymnal on the organ during the prayer.  You were always so proprietous in church but this undid even you.

You cutting my grapefruit for me every morning in high school and me hearing you and dad pray for me each day when I walked down the hall-made me so mad in my rebellious state but gee, thanks so much, mom.  I sure needed it.

You patiently helping me sew when I would get so upset and pitch a fit because I had no patience at all.  I still see your fingers running the fabric through the machine.  Your sweet little fingers.

You coming into the living room when I had broken up with a boyfriend and was distraught, rocking away my sorrows listening to "Tragedy" by the Bee Gees.  You looking so lost saying that you wished you could make it better.  I get it now.

You picking me up from school because I just walked out because my friends were being mean.

You dressing up as Mary Poppins for our youth group Halloween party.

The choir parties you always let me come to- "behind the barn he doth lurkey".

Singing with you in choir-"There'll be angels singing everywhere, their voices fill the evening air."  I still remember it.

You crying when I bought my first Black Sabbath Album.  I threw it away.

You getting a yellow pollen mustache from smelling the flower a little too closely at Campbells.  "The perennial with the yellow mustache."  Only we will know, mom.

Us hearing the myna bird in Fox's-"wee, wee, wee, wee, wee, wee, wee"-up and down the scale.  We laughed so hard.  We laughed a lot together, mom.  I am so glad.  Not everyone knew your funny, silly side.  But I did.

You making the frozen macaroon ice cream treats in the cupcake holders that I loved so much.  You knew all our favorite foods.  You made life magical, mom.